Tuesday, July 28, 2009

Yard Sale Anonymous

Hello everyone, my name is Vanessa Henderson and I am addicted to selling things.

Ahhhh....yard sales. We all yearn to get rid of crap, clean house, move on, get a grip on our new lives and what better way to get that ball rolling then to have a yard sale?!

Advice to anyone who loves to gamble and is also ready to have a yard sale....be strong, don't waiver, because you will get addicted to selling your shit, and you will want to sell everything you have. And once you have sold everything at your yard sale (which may pour into a few yard sales and some craigslist items because you can't help yourself) don't allow yourself to start selling things you just purchased, or that don't belong to you, because I can guarantee you that is where you will end up, its the rock bottom of yard selling, and its not pretty. Yard sales are for the strong, the sober and the non-addictive types. This is why last weekend when I decided to have a yard sale, I really should have talked to a sponsor about it.

Once I set my mind to it, it was "look out everything I own because you will be sold this weekend." I set a goal to get rid of everything I hadn't used in the past 6 months to a year, which automatically qualifies everything in my storage unit (minus my Anna Sui shoes, some signed footballs, a couple more pairs of shoes, my favorite winter coat, and some important documents ;) everything else must go!!!!

I did the deed, I advertised the sale on craigslist and posted signs, it was official my stuff would be sold. This is where the need to get rid of stuff starts to kick in because it's only Monday and the sale isn't until Saturday, but my apartment was full of boxes packed with things to sell and I needed it out of there stat-pronto, what to do?! I started posting the large items on craigslist, and one by one they began to sell. This is where yard sale-ing really is like an addiction, I had random people stopping by my apartment at all hours of the day and night to pick up things that were only available for cash, no checks, can't have the paper trail. And I found myself getting such a rush every time someone drove away from the front window, knowing that those things were not mine anymore, and that I had some sweet sweet cash from it to add to the stash.

So it's the day of the sale, I've already been awake on a tagging binge for at least 24 hours. I arrive to set up at 6:00 and people are already lingering, and its funny because they are pacing back and forth, looking over the fence with their hands in their pockets and it was then I realized that my same need to get rid of stuff as fast as possible was just as strong as their need to purchase and store completely useless things that they may or may not already have one or more of. Because honestly, although a lot of the stuff I was selling was super legit, there was a lot of crap there too. I wanted to warn these people, somehow save their lives....don't do it, you don't need this shit (especially to the woman who bought all of my used candles for $1 a piece, seriously what are you going to do with those?!) But I didn't, I just stood there shouting across boxes and tables with glassware on them "$1," "50 cents," "$3 for all of them," until slowly (seriously slowly I was there until 2pm) almost everything was gone.

As I boxed up the left overs (and the high priced things I am now selling on craigslist) I felt a huge sense of relief. This weight has come off my shoulders, I no longer own anything that I don't need or love (of course, again, except for my Anna Sui shoes and a few other random fashion items ;) So long 1 hour red high heels that look smokin' hot but I always get stuck wearing for at least 4 or 5 hours until I think my feet are going to fall of my legs. And good-bye killer goth jacket that I thought I would wear when I was feeling really dark and intense and never did because when I felt that way I never went anywhere. My life can start fresh, my closet doesn't have faded old tank tops falling out of it anymore, and my shoes that are left are all comfortable, trendy and totally wearable.

I hope that this blog inspires all the women and men out there who just have way too much crap to get rid of it. Let it go. What is the point? Why pay to store things you don't use anymore? It's not worth it, life goes on. I know that you don't want to get rid of the cheerleading outfit you were wearing when you smoked your first bowl after a freshman football game, or the T-shirt you won for eating a huge steak at AJ Spurs at a dudes night out (no names mentioned....Ben), but I can guarantee you that you will feel better when you do (Ben), and so will everyone around you (especially your significant other ;).

Next on the list, Shoppers Anonymous.